ON LOVE

Photo via The Retrograder

We loved this post on A Cup of Joe this morning. John Steinbeck is just about our favorite author of all time, and reading his thoughtful response to his son's confession of being in love was a treat. 


Who wouldn't want to get a letter like this? And, is it just us or isn't Steinbeck pretty damn hot?

FOREVER

In honor of Valentine's Day and as a tribute to our Valentine, it's time to share our story of the Really Big Year. Honestly, it's impossible to convey all that has happened, the magic and wonder of everything clicking into place. (Yes, we've become one of those annoying google-eyed girls.) But, we'll try.

(Illustration by Ellen Van Engelen)

On the day after Valentine's, last year, we had a first date. It was a setup, we've mentioned it before. It was the best first date ever and we quickly started spending a lot of time with the guy. By the fourth date (or so) we were convinced he was one of the most beautiful people we'd ever met and in less than six weeks we were definitely in love.

So many moments: Sitting in the garden before a dinner date sipping champagne cocktails with petals floating in them (yes, he made these, we didn't!). Kissing in the car when he dropped us off. Being so scared about what we were feeling, but willing to admit it to him. Our first weekend together where we decided to do "normal," weekend things. Meeting his family and how generous and open they were with us.

For Memorial Day weekend we took him to our aunt and uncle's cabin in the woods and it was there, in our tent one night that he first asked us to marry him. If you'd told us that this was possible - three and a half months after meeting someone - we would have said no-way. But it's true.

It was about that time that we decided we wanted to have baby and pretty-darn-quick we were pregnant. It's been a whirlwind since and now we're six weeks away from our due date! Can you believe it?

We know, we're incredibly lucky. We can't forget that, for even a minute. 

And the reason we're sharing is because it's important to be reminded that crazy and beautiful things happen every day. Be open to them. Be willing to push yourself and try. Even if it doesn't work out the first gazillion times. You can make your life into whatever you want. 

We were closer to it happening for us then we could have ever imagined.

OF ALL THE THINGS

We just love this story about how mistyping an email address lead to romance and ultimately, marriage. Just had to share.





Do you know any sweet-but-unbelievable stories about how lovers met? Please share!


Coming up (finally) - our story about how we met the man we want to spend the rest of our life with.

WE'RE BAAACK!

OK, we know we've been gone too long. But our life has been upended in all the good ways and we're still spinning and madly in love.


Remember that guy we told you about awhile back - the one who kissed us for the first time and told us we were beautiful? Now he's our - ahem - fiancé.


We know we owe you a story about how we went from madly-dating-and-cynical-single-girl to the annoyingly-happy-engaged-gal who tells her single friends - "You never know, this might be your last first date ever. He could be the one." Yep, it's wonderfully true (and slightly annoying, we know).


But first, a shout out to all our favorite singletons in the form of a hilarious book of haikus.


Haiku For The Single Girl from Dan Meth on Vimeo.

 .

TIME TO BE DIRECT

Remember that guy we told you awhile ago? The one who "wanted to hear our voice for the first time in person" and then sent a stick-it-to-you email to us? Well, he got in touch again. A full 51 days after his last email, which we didn't respond to. Interesting.


FROM HIM
I am still curious as to how I missed out on a chance to take you out on a date.

P


Persistent. Since silence didn't work. Maybe it's time to be straight with him.


OUR RESPONSE
P, if you must know:


1) We asked you to call and you didn't, giving some weird line about wanting to hear our voice for the first time in person. We clearly wanted to speak on the phone prior to going on a date.
2) There were other guys we were more interested in going out with at the time so we felt no urgency with you.
3) You sent us a totally rude and immature email after we didn't respond to your advances.
4) We've met someone...the relationship has progressed in the past few weeks and we're not interested in dating other people.


We know that the online dating world can be pretty harsh and laced with vagueness. And we may approach it in a pretty cutthroat way that might not be fair. 


There have been lots of guys that we've had online conversations with who've suddenly stopped interacting, who we've gone on date with and who've never followed up. To us, that's just part of the process and we try not to take it personally. We guess we just figured that most people saw it that way. We never meant to be rude or hurtful.


Good luck to you.


What do you think? A fair response? We wonder if we'll hear from him again.

ROMEO LIVES UPSTAIRS

Our upstairs neighbor had been terrorizing us for months with his stomping, slamming, music playing and general loud-ass-ness. 


We had take action when bumping, grinding and moaning were added to the list of offenses. We trudged up to ask him to please, try, please. Keep it down. 


Can you believe it - he had the nerve to ask us out on the spot! Uh-huh. Now we were really surprised. What about the girl he was just doing?


Damn! Guess you can't get in the way of a player, especially if he lives upstairs.

BREAKING IT DOWN

We've found that every time we try online dating we meet a few nice-enough guys. A few duds (or just not people we want to date again) and at least one total weirdo.

Maybe it's just us, but we're sharing an email/text conversation so you can tell us which one of the categories that P falls into.

Email #1 (from P)

I enjoyed your pitch, "If you're curious, like an adventure and are open minded and kind - we'll have something to talk about." I like adventures, and am ashamed to admit how few I have had recently. Although the best one of late was the Lynwood Skate and Bowl. For 13 bucks you can have a two sport night.



Some things I will use to my advantage,

1) Beige is bad

2) The Columbia city theater is fun

3) The Sculpture Park is great use of "pork barrel" spending

4) I haven't read a lot, but "East of Eden" is a masterpiece

5) Canadian whisky is not whiskey.

6) The Melrose Market beats Serious Pies hands down.

*) This one is probably not to my advantage. Steve Sher should not be on the radio, he drives me nuts, and they have the nerve to give him two hours.

Open to a beer? A stroll weather permitting? Dumplings?



P

The list he references above relates to our bio. We share a bunch of things we like - whiskey, books, NPR, etc. and say that they can use them to their advantage, if they want.

We're going to stay away from the political "pork barrel" spending comment, because we don't exactly know what he's talking about and if we think about it too much we might eliminate him from the possibility pool. And so, we write back.

Hi P,



Have you been to the Columbia City Theater since it's been redone? Such a great venue! We've never been to the Lynwood Skate & Bowl. Wait, take that back. We may have been there to skate ages and ages ago. We're not so good at bowling or skating. But, what can you do?



We are open to a beer or a stroll. Although we have to get one thing straight right now - we like Steve Sher and you can't change our mind! At least we can agree on East of Eden. A favorite. Have you read his other stuff?



Hope you're having a good day. The sun is so dazzling!



Me

Email #2

I have to say I have not been to the Columbia City Theater in a while. The last time I was there Angie's across the street was still in business. I like Columbia City but it is a little far especially when drinking is involved. If only the city of Seattle could get light rail going quicker, but alas it is going to be a while.



I will say the one thing I like on Weekday is when they bring in the guy who covers Canadian Politics. Of course never really remember any names, except for Stephen Harper. It is nice to hear about North American Politics other then the violence in Mexico, or the in fighting here. I put my foot down when it comes to Organic Gardening Tuesdays. Every time I am working on site and that comes on, the crew turns on me and I lose control of the radio for the rest of the day. My absolute favorite thing on NPR is the Writer's Almanac in the afternoon.



I know it is late in the week, how does a beer and some pinball tomorrow night sound? Maybe Shorty's? I am open to any sort of random idea to meet outside of bungee jumping or karaoke. If tomorrow is too soon, maybe sometime next week.



I look forward to meeting you.



P
(he includes his phone number)

What's with the political rant? We're into politics and news and such, but seems a little intense for a get-to-know-you email...Oh well, we like a guy who has opinions. 

Also, we have to say that we like for a guy to ask us for our number and call us. We don't plan on calling him first. Although we're probably being unreasonable.

Hi P,





Unfortunately, we don't think a date this weekend is going to work. We've come down with the dreaded cold that everyone is suffering from and want to take it easy and not subject anyone to our bad germs!



Maybe next week? (we give him our phone number)



Me

We also don't mention that we have several other dates lined up for the week and weekend, despite our cold. Our calendar is booked!

Email #3

Well I am sorry to hear that you aren't feeling well, and hope you feel better soon. Give me a call when you have recovered. I look froward to hearing from you.



P

At this point, we decide we're not that into this guy. Especially not enough to pursue a date by calling him when we're over our cold. But, at some point the next week, he emails us again.

Email #4

I hope you are feeling better. It seems you and half of Seattle are trying to beat this cold. I was reading an article about some new places on The Hill that I wanted to try. Interested?



P

Dear P,

It goes in phases. Right now We're feeling quite stuffy. But earlier today we were feeling much better. Thanks for asking. How are you?



Trying a new place on Cap Hill would be fun. Did we give you our number? (we give him our number again)



Me

We know know that we've already given him our phone number. But are trying to make the point that we want him to call us. Is it just us or does jumping from email to a date seem to be skipping a step? Call us old fashioned, but we like to chat once or twice. At least to make a plan.

Email #5

Be patient with this cold, it seems that it takes about 4 days to get over. I have seen a couple people try to come back too soon only to get knocked down. So take care of yourself and healthy doses of chicken soup.



So I have kind of an ambitious idea for a date. I read an article about these new speakeasies in Capitol Hill. I was thinking we could take a walking tour and check them out. All three of them are right around 12th and Pike. This week I am kinda busy during the week, and Saturday I have a Christening I have to attend since I am the Godfather. I was thinking either Friday or Saturday night if that works for you.



You gave me your number, but I kinda want to hear your voice in person. Also I kinda like the anticipation of seeing if you wrote me back. Hope to hear from you soon.



P

Yikes! This totally weirds us out. We realize that not everyone is a phone person like we are. And have accepted that lots of guys text us rather than calling but...hearing our voice first in person?!? It comes off as weird, right?

We get a text from P (So he does know how to use the phone)

I hope you have made a full recovery. Are you interested in getting together tomorrow or Saturday? 

We decide we don't want to go out with this guy. He seems off. Someone we for- sure don't want to date. We know that his intentions probably aren't coming across as he meant them to...Plus we've met someone else that we really like and don't feel like going on random dates with guys who've already raised red flags. 

We ask our friend if we should be up-front and just email P back and tell him that we're not interested. And maybe tell him that if a girl gives him her phone number usually it means she wants him to call her. And he should, even if his preference is different. But she tells us that's not our job.

Email #6

Are you still interested in meeting for a drink sometime?



P

As discussed, we don't respond.

Email #7

Well, I had no idea Steve Sher could be so divisive. Good luck out there.



P

Um, maybe we were a jerk for not emailing him back and saying we're not interested. But his last email, putting us in our place, seems rather unnecessary. Although it is sorta funny...

So, what do you think? Are we being unreasonably judgmental? Please tell us! And please share your crazy-man stories, we're in the need of a few laughs.

WE'RE OBSESSED

This is a story with a soundtrack. 


The Doe Bay Sessions - Curtains for You from Sound on the Sound on Vimeo.


Recently, we attended a show at Richard Hugo House. It was a part of a literary series. 


Each artist - two writers and three musicians - were asked to write new work based on the theme "Brief Encounters" and preform. It was really amazing. 


Our favorites were the Hannah Hynes-Mumford's (a high school senior, impressive!) reading and Macklemore. Both mind-blowing in different ways. It was a special treat to see how Macklemore's rap techniques translated to the essay he wrote and vice versa.


And it reminded us of a brief encounter of our own.


Last fall we stopped by a vintage shop called Indian Summer. We scored some great stuff and admired this cool men's shawl-collar Pendelton sweater on a mannequin. As we were paying two guys walked in. One was super-cute and happened to be wearing the exact same sweater as the mannequin.


Of course, we blurted out "You're wearing the same sweater..." (it was a small store) and trotted over to him to check the labels of both sweaters and confirm. Did we mention how cute he was?  


He told us that he got his sweater from his grandfather. And that was that. 


A few weeks later we were lucky enough to be invited to a house show featuring The Head and The Heart (don't be jealous), Kelli Schafer and Drew Grow and the Pastor's Wives. And, in between getting totally wasted - we went alone and were nervous, don't judge - we spotted a familiar looking guy. But we couldn't figure out why. Until at the end of the night he put on the sweater - it was him again!


Who is he? He must know someone we know...this is just crazy.


And then, on New Year's day, we walked around Greenlake with a friend - it was a beautiful day. And who did we see walking the opposite direction? Yep, Cute Sweater Guy! 


We couldn't help but jump. And we think he noticed us because we made brief eye contact. He gives us goosebumps.


Weird huh? It makes us wonder how many times we cross the paths of the same people but never recognize them.


Since then we've seen him around even more and actually figured out that we do have friends in common. No, we're not stalking him. But, for some reason he makes us incredibly nervous and we haven't gotten the courage to introduce ourselves yet. 

A FULL MOON

Pickwick at Conor Byrne open mic, photo via Picwick

Last Sunday we went to an open mic* that we like - lots of friends, great local music and it's a good way to kickoff the week. 


We were hanging out, drinking a beer when we noticed this guy looking at us. 


He was rocking an Axle Rose look, and not-in-a -good-way. Later, and completely unprovoked, a guy friend of ours asked us "what was up with the dude with the jock strap on his head?" Now you see our issue?


Even though we were avoiding eye contact, dude sidled up to us and...


Axle: Where you from?


Us: Here.


Axle (looking at us as if we were bullshitting him): But you're drinking PBR - isn't it from the Midwest somewhere?


Us: Uh, yeah...?


We weren't sure there was a correlation.


Axle: So, really, where are you from.


Us (confused): Here? (implying, what are you getting at here?)


And then, because suddenly we felt awkward and bad. Like he was trying to make us sorry for being rude. Even though we weren't.


Us: Well, technically we were born in Texas, but we grew up here.


Axle: Born in Texas, huh?


Us: Sí.


Axle (now really looking at us as if we're being the rudest): Sí?


Honestly, we don't know why that popped out. He stomped of.


How do guys have a way of doing that? Making a girl feel like she's being a bitch if she's nice, but not giving him what he think he deserves? The four friends who happened to witness the exchange rolled their eyes and gave us the "lucky you lost that one," look.


Axle continued to work the girls in the room. The man was persistent. It got worse - at some point he let his long, curly hair down and it hung in a tangled mess over the jock strap thingymajig.


At the end of the night, we were standing at the front of the room, along the wall with a few others, listening to the last of the music and watching Axle/Jock Strap interact with a girl at the bar.


A camera came out and suddenly his pants dropped and all five of us were treated to a peek at his bare ass. It wasn't an accident. We don't even want to think about what you could see from the camera angle! Ugh.


Not that we were questioning our earlier judgment - but it looks like we ducked a good one.


*A great story (and videos) about Picwick at the open mic. If you haven't heard of them, they're definitely worth a listen. We hope the band doesn't mind being featured in this story. They're absolute gentlemen! 

2 WEEKS, 1 GIRL, 5 DATES, 4 GUYS

Yep, that means we're online dating again. And it's keeping us busy. This time we decided to try a local source - thought it might provide more interesting prospects. And so far, so good.


And, we got set up!


The first online date left us feeling deflated. We mean, the guy was nice, cute, interesting, etc. But...there wasn't much there. And we believed that he agreed. 


We wondered - how many first dates are we going to have go go on before we get at least a spark of intrigue and excitement? Where we feel confident that he feels the same? We don't think our expectations are that high - we know it's not likely that we're going to go on a first date and come home thinking "He's the one." But, we'd at least like to think more than "We guess it was OK and will say yes, we think, if he asks us out again." Just to see.


Second date was the setup. We've never been really setup before. Have you?


And it was so fun. Gave us hope again. Even though we were super nervous (not to mention the fact that we'd never even seen a picture of this guy - and believe us, we tried. Googling him and all. Nothing.). He was interesting, sexy, easy-to-talk-to, fun, left us wanting more.


We planned a second date right then. 


And, later that week we scheduled two more online dates.


Second date with the setup - he took us to a great neighborhood restaurant. Ordered wine. We ate and talked our hearts out. And then we kissed goodbye. Asked him when we'd see him again. And he said he hoped soon. And then we kissed some more. Right on the street. In front of the restaurant. How fun!


He told us we were beautiful. And it was perfect.


Tomorrow we have another online first date. And Sunday morning coffee with another. Whew - it's making us tired thinking of it! But, really, we can't wait to see setup guy again...


This is good, right?

MOVING ON IN

Two years ago on Valentine's Day, we moved in with our boyfriend S. Not really a romantic way to celebrate. But it was a sweet, exciting step to take.

The only plans we had for the day were to do a lot of heavy lifting. 

We were outside loading the truck while S was putting his fridge stuff into a cooler. We walked past and saw that he was trying to quickly hide a box of chocolate covered strawberries inside. 

The surprise was ruined but we were touched. Isn't he a great guy?

THE SWEET LIST

We've been lucky to date a lot of really nice, thoughtful guys. But one stands out in particular.

1. We were long distance. A few weeks before Valentine's Day he sent us a box of fortune cookies with these instructions: Eat one a day until V-day, when we would see each other. It didn't take long to realize that each cookie had a custom fortune, ranging from favorite memories we shared, to little things he liked about us. Come on - adorable!

2) Sometimes it's the little things. Once, we stepped out of a shower to find boyfriend waiting for us with freshly heated (with a hairdryer) socks so our feet wouldn't get cold. 

3) He told us we were going to his cousin Tony's wedding in Portland. We drove down, got dressed up and headed to the event - gift in hand. We sat on the groom's side. It took us awhile to realize that this was actually Tony and Tina's wedding, the production! We loved that he tricked us. And had us going for awhile. We thought his "cousin" was nuts!

HE LOVES ME, HE LOVES ME NOT, HE LOVES...

Things had been exclusive with this guy for about six weeks by the time Valentine's Day rolled around. But, because a) we're attachment-phobic and b) didn't totally believe that he was into us for real, we weren't about to bring it up.


So, we were shocked when he not only mentioned it, he wanted to take us out. Imagine that - a date with a guy we liked on Valentine's!


He proposed dinner and then catching his brother's show at the oldest bar in the city. When we arrived at his house (he didn't have a car, so we usually drove) he surprised us with roses. He hadn't struck us as the romantic type.


The sweetest thing wasn't even the flowers, although they were lovely. It was the fact that he'd ridden the bus to the florist and then BACK with flowers. On Valentine's Day. (He told us that several women-and-fellow-bus-riders even commented!) He really liked us.


The evening was perfect. A spicy dinner, great music and the best company. (We even convinced the door guy to draw a heart on our wrist with Sharpie instead of his regular X!)


And, even though things didn't work out with the guy, we dried-and-saved one of the roses for a long time to remind us to believe in surprises and that we are lucky and loved.

THE ONE

Photo by Leah Reich via sfgirlbybay

We had been dating T for about four months. We were a single mom and our son's sixth birthday was coming up. We love parties but they can be overwhelming, especially when you're like us and obsess over the most ridiculous details. This particular birthday was putting us over the edge.

T offered to make the party favors. We were touched by the offer. 


Being a control-freak, we normally wouldn't have accepted. But, we were completely overwhelmed and knew it. So we took him up on it. And told ourselves we weren't going to tell him what to do. We were so grateful. 

We expected standard favors - little bags full of candy, leggos, plastic toys, puzzles, etc. Or something.

T arrived with CD’s illustrated with an image of a train. Each one was filled with great kid’s music including “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” by Iz, and were protected in individual colorful CD holders. He passed them out when all of the guests were leaving.

This is when we knew - this man was a serious keeper.

CHOCOLATE-FILLED HEARTS

A few years ago we were single for the first time in seven years on Valentines day. We were dating a lot but nothing serious. We decided to have a non-romantic but not-lonely night with a guy we had been hooking up with off and on. He came over and brought us a flower. We got to it and he left. We admit it, it felt just right.

The next year, we were in a relationship that looked like it could go all the way. We had been dating for about 10 months and it was our first V-day together. He made a big fuss about not liking Hallmark holidays so we expected zilch. 


On Valentines day, a Saturday, we woke up to the most amazing custom-ordered chocolates from our man. We spent the day in bed together, enjoying the chocolate and whatnot. From then on we've called Valentine's the Chocolate Holiday. Not bad, huh? 


Two years later, we're marrying him. And we know what we have to look forward to for the rest of our lives!

SKIPPING A BEAT

This is the story of the Valentine's Day that never was.

One year, we were dating a couple of guys. Sort of. Not really. Our love life was actually quite a sad mess.

And we had been working way too much. We worked our ass off all summer long, never went camping, or to an outdoor concert, or even a picnic. It was all work, allthetime.

We get it. The truth about men who are afraid of commitment is that they disappear a few weeks before Valentine’s Day...and reappear a few days afterward. This was the case that year. 


So, we decided to treat ourself to summer-in-the-middle-of-winter in February with a trip to Australia.


On February 13th, we flew to Sydney, Australia. And in the middle of the night, we crossed the international dateline and instantly it was February 15th.

The plane landed on a bright, happy autumn morning and we recall the bells of St. Mary’s Cathedral ringing to greet us as our taxi took us to the hotel. 

We had completely skipped February 14^th, and it was perfect.

SWEETNESS

Valentine's photo via Urban Weeds.

We have a distinct memory of our 8th grade art teacher reminding us, on a day we were doing some sort of Valentine's-related project, that the word was spelled S-W-E-E-T, not S-W-E-A-T. We blame him for us always second-guessing our spelling.


Anyway.


We're going to do something fun in February and we need your help. Valentine's posts. At least two a week. That means we need eight stories. Or more.


So submit 'em. Please. 


They can be romantic, funny, tragic. They don't even have to be from Valentine's Day. Just a good story where your Valentine (or your mom or a friend) did something really sweet. Or at least notable. Birthdays, anniversaries, etc. work, too.


Email us your stories to hellochopsuey (at) gmail (dot) com.


P.S. Isn't this photo HOT? We love the hipster-take on the pinup girl by one of our fave blogs, Urban Weeds. At the Ace Hotel in Portland no less. Cool. Someday, when we have a really special Valentine, we're going to do this.

SOUPAPALOOZA

Last week we were oh-so-not-tactfully reminded that "no one wants to be alone during the holidays." 

Right.

Our dating life has been a bit sparse lately. So, in an effort to stave-off being alone - and mostly because a bunch of friends were in town and we've been wanting to host a soup party for years - we made a big pot of soup and invited the masses.

We also made amazing savory cookies (cheddar and jalapeno, yes please) from Design*Sponge, man we love those recipes!

The kiddo-guests were hilarious. Lots of hugs, kisses and catching up. People brought bread (and even homemade onion focaccia, yum), wine and a special dessert. It was a blast.

We love our friends and family. Happy (almost) New Year! 

What do you have planned for 2011?

RED LENTIL SOUP WITH COCONUT MILK & SPICED BUTTER*

Serves 4

3/4 t ground cumin

3/4 t curry powder

1/2 t fennel seeds, lightly crushed

1/4 t dried thyme, crushed

1/4 t ground nutmeg

1 T vegetable oil

1 1/2 c finely chopped yellow onion

3/4 c finely chopped carrot

1 medium clove garlic, peeled and minced

2 jalapenos (we've also used 1 Anaheim chili), seeded and minced

2 t finely grated fresh ginger

1 1/2 c red lentils, rinsed

1 can (14.5 oz) vegetable broth

3 1/2 c water

1 c unsweetened coconut milk (we used light)

1 t kosher salt

1/4 t black pepper

3 T fresh lime juice

2 T cilantro, chopped

2 T butter (or butter substitute if you want to do vegan)

1. In a small bowl combine cumin, curry, fennel, thyme and nutmeg. Set aside.

2. In a soup pot, heat oil over medium-low heat. Saute the onion about 4 minutes. Stir in carrot and saute about 3 minutes. Add garlic, jalapeno and ginger, saute 2 minutes. 

3. Add lentils, broth and water. Stir in 3/4 t of the spice mixture. Bring to boil, cover and reduce heat to medium-low. Simmer, stirring occasionally, 30 minutes (be careful that stuff doesn't stick to the bottom of the pan and burn). The lentils should be soft and falling apart.

4. Remove from heat. Cool about 10 minutes. Stir in the  coconut milk, salt, pepper, lime juice and cilantro.

5. Melt the butter in a small pan and stir in the remaining spice mixture. Cook 1 minute. Stir into soup and serve.

*Recipe via our mom but originally from the Seattle Times, we think.

A GREAT STORY WITH A NOT-SO-HAPPY ENDING

Speakeasies are all the rage in Seattle. Last weekend we decided to check one out with a friend. After ringing the doorbell we were greeted by a hostess who led us to our reserved seats. It’s small and oh so cool. You should go.

Scoping out the room, we notice a cute guy. But, he was talking to a couple of other girls. They must be together and we dismissed the idea of meeting an interesting fellow.

Not long after, Cutie came over and started a conversation. Really cute. We swooned.

Turns out he came alone. Lively conversation followed. He mentioned how he and his friends liked to live life to the fullest. We were intrigued. After a night out, they choose:

Option A - Go home and sleep

Option B - Don't end the night, but also don't do anything noteworthy (like head somewhere for an after-hours drink)

Option C - Do something a little crazy and fun, like sneaking up to the penthouse suite of a ritzy hotel and hot tubing until the sun comes up

When our friend went to powder her nose, Cutie asked if we were up for Option C. He suggested a drive to the mountains to throw snowballs and enjoy the first snowfall of the year. We told him we were up for anything. (Really, we thought he was all talk.)

We closed the bar. Guy offered us a ride home. In his 1983 gold Porsche – hello!

We figured that in that car, a bit of kissing would be a possibility. Our friend said goodnight and Cutie asked if we were up for that drive to the mountains.

While the risks did pop into our head (potential murderer, driving into the mountains at 2 am, etc.), adventure trumped doubts.

There was a blanket in the back, and we had a hat and gloves in our bag so we cozied up for the ride ahead. There was no radio but plenty of "getting to know you" conversation. And for some reason Cutie allowed us to go through his wallet (yes, we’re nosy). He actually encouraged, probably due to the fact that we noted he could be a murderer. Out loud.

At the pass it was snowing. Snowballs were thrown. Which led to kissing.

Heading back to the city, Cutie asked what we wanted next. We replied, “What do you want to do?”

“Take you back to my place and have my way with you," he replied. Sigh.

We considered, but it was really, really late. We were tired and while we were interested, we weren't interested enough. So we told Cutie we’d had enough adventure for the night. "Good for you," he said as he patted our leg.

We thanked him for not murdering us.

Back at home but still sitting in the gold Porsche, we waited for him to ask for our number, but he didn't. And we weren’t going to ask for his. With a kiss and a "see you around" we said good night and were confident that not going home with him was the right decision.

We kind of felt alive from the experience. And that was enough.

Curiosity got the best of us and the next day we Googled him. (Knew his first and last name from the wallet browsing, remember?)

Top of the list: Engagement announcement from August.

Could've been a different guy with the same name? Wrong. There was a photo. And, to make it worse, Cutie was getting married in a week.

Ugh. A little guilt for kissing him followed, but how were we supposed to know? 

Which makes us now wonder, do we have to ask every guy we meet if he has a girlfriend? Or, if he's engaged? Is this another thing we need to worry about?

We squashed the urge to send a message via Facebook to his bride. But, now you know – don’t fall for the Cutie with the 1983 Gold Porsche and his adventure story.